I used to resent my past self for the mistakes that were instrumental in making me what I am today. Sounds paradoxical, doesn't it?
What the present self could not see was that the negative energy directed toward the past was actively sabotaging the future. It was an endless software loop — a glitch in the code that blocked everything downstream. Bizarre, how shortsighted we can sometimes be.
Then I encountered Saint John Chrysostom's millennia-old advice:
If you have to hate, love the person, hate the act.
The advice seemed impossible to integrate, but its impact was systemic. I started finding self-love along the way, rewiring memory by memory, managing finally to focus on loving the past person rather than constantly judging him.
Gradually, I began to appreciate the mistakes. That appreciation grew until one day, I shared a very painful story with a friend. While I was sharing it, I felt something new: genuine love and gratitude — both for the man I was and the mistake he'd made. For the first time ever, the cage my past thoughts had built around my heart melted.
The loop was broken.
Unintentionally, I was guided toward uncovering the procedure: finding the bug, editing the code, and pushing a new release that shifted the entire timeline of my life.
The blockage was removed, and energy was released to flow freely again.
The next task? To find the virus that caused the issue in the first place.
The thought, the word, the experience, or the person who got me blocking myself.